(9:00 A.M. - 10:00 A.M.)
Review/Commentary
Reviewer: D
Well, frankly, the quick acceleration of 24 this season has left skid marks on my brain. Being treated to 2 nights and 4 hours of the show ("2"..."4"..."24", hmmm, could this be a subtle plug for that new "Numb3rs" series? No wait, that’s on CBS…) all in a row like that has me staggering a bit to integrate it all.
But in service to you, our reader, I will struggle to keep all the players straight and comment cohesively (ha!) on the many intriguing plot lines emerging. This season the show's writers have provided at least one service along the lines of keeping things simple: almost all of the female characters are nasty. While 24 seems like it's a show about boys and their toys, this season it could justifiably be renamed "The Twitchy Bitch Hour." We have Driscoll, bitch in charge; Chloe, cranky co-worker bitch; Dina Araz, spooky homicidal bitch; and now the new bitch on the block, Marianne. In fact, the only female characters who aren't bitches are Audrey Heller and Behrooz's squeeze, Debbie, who fulfill the “damsel in distress” roles. (And given the short life-span of 24's accessory characters, at least one of these damsels may be put out of her distress pretty soon, if you know what I mean.) So what do you think, do the 24 writers have some unresolved issues with women?
We start out this hour with a testament to the depth of Driscoll's bitchiness. Was it just me or did she seem awfully petulant in her little report to the president? I've had some bitchy bosses before but no matter how irritable they were, I think they would have sucked it up if they were talking to the freakin' leader of the free world! The substance of her report was "we're working on it." I would have liked it if Keeler said "Well, you damn well better be - isn't that what we pay you for?" Instead, we get “keep us closely posted.” What does that even mean?
One random question: do we know where the heck Keeler is flying to? He's been in the air more than an hour so it ain't no quick hop. I'm just wondering if I missed something. Also, I know it makes sense that Mr. Bland (i.e., Keeler) won the election but can we have a short moment of silence in deference to the departure of David Palmer, that is, the commanding and inspiring Palmer of Days 1 and 2, not the useless wet blanket of Day 3?
Thanks.
OK, so back at CTU, no one knows anything about anything leaving them all dependent on Jack to stay hot on the trail of Lexus-driving bad guy. So, of course, Driscoll disavows Jack, essentially cutting the cord on their only lead. Just a note to those pesky writers: enough already, we get it. Driscoll is not only a bitch, she's a dumb bitch. Perhaps in order to drum it firmly and annoyingly into our heads that she's bad, you can have her flagrantly misuse government resources? And after that, perhaps a bath in the blood of virgins?
On the streets of L.A., Jack gives us a slice of "Bourne Supremacy" (if you haven't seen it, you really aren't 24 fan material) with his exit off the on-ramp, wherein he yells at a school bus to get out of the way. Um, Jack, they can't hear you and have you noticed that you're going the wrong way?
Five minutes after Driscoll tells everyone to find Jack, everyone still knows nothing and we are treated to some of the lamest CTU dialogue ever, with Curtis saying “There’s a lot of places they could be” (no kidding!) and Driscoll giving the Dilbert-esque directive: “Make something happen.” At this point, I have to second J’s curiosity about where they get these CTU directors. We KNOW Driscoll didn’t sleep herself to the top (*** SHUDDER***) so how did such a blatant incompetent end up yakking with the prez about having to waste the Secretary of Defense?
In the midst of all this, we find out that CTU's Curtis has been fraternizing with the consultants, and I mean that only in the horizontal sense. This introduction of Marianne - dropped into the maelstrom of the rest of action - felt like a cold slap. Actually, the bright, cheery colors of Marianne’s world contrasted with CTU’s steel gray made it more like a warm, fuzzy slap. Regardless, all I could think is “Who is this chick and can we just get back to the car chase please?”
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